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Saturday, July 12, 2008

Bernie Mac Embarrasses the HEY-ELL OUT OF Barack Obama: Acolytes Shut It DOWN!

"Being a president is tough ‘cause you're not just running the county. You got to run your family too," Mac said. "Having a black first lady is different. You're still going have to do the dishes and the laundry and all that …you got to pick up the kids. You didn't pick up the kids? I just came from Korea, talking about nuclear weapons. You were on Air Force One and you couldn't stop to pick up the kids?" Mac also told Obama to be cautious of the rumor mill. “People like rumors. They are going to say things like, you know, you was in the club with Lil’ Kim and you and Kanye West got in a fist fight.Bernie Mac At Obama Fundraiser
Poor Bernie Mac, he didn't get the memo: THOU SHALL NOT EMBARRASS THE HEY-ELL OUT OF BARACK OBAMA! Because if you do, you will incur the WRATH of..... The Obama Acolytes. *shivers* I'm scared to even speak their name.

There are Obama supporters. There are Obama "stans" ( stalker fans). Then, there are the Obama Acolytes as we fondly refer to them here. The Obama Acolytes are like a paramilitary mercenary force. They work independent of the campaign and take orders from no one in particular. They won't even listen to their candidate. They are friends, relatives, and coworkers. Ordinary, generally well loving people except for one occasional problem, they view anyone and anything that might in anyway get in the way of Barack Obama making it to 1600 Avenue as the ENEMY that must be destroyed at all costs.

Now Barack Obama tried to play it all off and smooth things over:
"We can't afford to be divided by race. We can't afford to be divided by region or by class and we can't afford to be divided by gender, which by the way, that means, Bernie, you've got to clean up your act next time," Obama said. "This is a family affair. By the way, I'm just messing with you, man."
Later the campaign offered a sterner rebuke to Bearnie not knowing how to behave at a $2,300/plate political fundraiser:
"Sen. Obama told Bernie Mac that he doesn't condone these statements and believes what was said was inappropriate," spokeswoman Jen Psaki said in a statement after the event.
Bernie, you remember growing up when your Mama would take you to the store and you would think about acting a fool and your Mama would smile as she give you "The Look" that said " I ain't gone beat you in front of all these people and embarrass myself further in a public setting, but when we get home IT'S ON!?" And you would try to be really quiet in the car hoping that she would forget you acting a fool and embarrassing her in public, but she never forgot. Well Bernie, Barack Obama might have tried to be genial about it, but the Acolytes will remember... poor Bernie he didn't get the memo: DO NOT EMBARRASS THE HEY_ELL OUT OF BARACK OBAMA... OR ELSE!

Unlike the candidate that appears to be a genial enough fellow, these acolytes can be down right mean and even scary. Everybody knows one. Right now, the Acolytes are giving Bernie "the look."

If you are viewed as an obstacle standing in between the Acolytes and 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, you better be prepared to be plowed OVER. We've battled a few Acolytes in the comments section of this blog. They usually throw out a few "Uncle Toms", "Self- hating House Negroes", "race traitor" attacks before they head out the door.

I understand the Acolytes. Heck I am related to some of them. They think the dream is so close yet so fragile that the faintest breeze might blow it all away and thus they have designated themselves sentries of that dream and will attempt to annihilate anything that they think get in the way of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. I admire their zeal, but at times it is also disturbing, until I saw this... perhaps the Acolytes may be useful for some things?

For a moment I was getting nervous with all of that cutting up the Entertainment Industrial Complex was doing at the BET Awards. They were giddy about all the mischief they will be able to create in an Obama administration. I mean after all, he's playing Jay Z at campaign events:
During Obama's victory party in Iowa, Jay's "99 Problems" was played over the loud speaker. Some imply that the line "99 problems but a bitch ain't one" was a thinly veiled shot at his political rival.
Much to my dismay, they've already started putting his name in misogynistic, drug infused, violent Hip Hop lyrics.
It Goes Hilary Clinton, Barack Obama
Made The Moral Trap Or Die Ask DJ Drama
It Goes Freak Big Meech
And MuthaF@!k Osama (Yea)
An He Aint Talm Bout Nuttin So Wassup Lil Mama? (Aye)
I Think Ya Girl Want Me
And if She Don’t She Should (Should)
Three Of Four Bl*nts a’ Make The Sex So Good (Woo)
I Just Roll Em So Fast
We Just Blow Em So Fast (Fast)
Before I Even Know it We done Blew a whole Half (Yea)
Young Come Through Nightime Like A Burglar
Type O N*gga Leave His Skully On While He Service
Type O N*gga take a phone call While he Service
So What He at The Back Door?
What Chu Think Im Strapped For?
In fact last year CNN predicted as much
"More than anything his name is a nugget of lyrical gold," said Kweli. "It sounds like a gunshot going off ... Obama rhymes with a lot of things." CNN
Oh just great, his name rhymes with a lot of things. Could we survive 4 or 8 years of the Entertainment Industrial Complex running wild? Would they be embolden by his victory to take their minstrelsy to new lows, seeing the regime of Bullets, Booty and Bling as somehow more mainstream with a Black family in the White House. That certainly seemed the case at the BET Awards. AP

No you didn't want Barack Obama anywhere near that foolishness. Why? There is a new age in America, it is the age of the Acolyte. While Black people may have been reluctant to criticize other Black folks in public, the Acolytes have no such reservation. There is a woodshed with everybody's name on it and they will not hesitate to take you there if you even look like you might mess this 1600 Pennsylvania thing up.

Nothing and nobody gets in the way of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Black folks may have tolerated BET and "Tip Drill", We may have turned the other way when DL Hughley called the Rutger's team the "Ugliest women he had ever seen in his life." We might have turned a blind eye to "Flavor of Love", "I Love New York", and "Bad Girls Club". We may have let our children dance to "She's a very freaky girl you don't take her to Mama, first you get her name then you get her number then you get some @^%#$ s the front seat of a hummer" We may have let our kids chant "Do the Superman on dat 'ho," but the the acolytes won't tolerate ANYONE or ANYTHING that they think jeopardizes 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and they certainly will not tolerate anybody EMBARASSING THE HEY_ELL OUT OF BARACK OBAMA. So much so that when Bernie Mac brought out the standard fare of Black Comedians, sexism and raunch, people in the audience stood up and SHOUTED HIM DOWN!!! I died and went to heaven when I read this:

As the joke continued, the punchline evoked an angry response from at least one person in the audience, who said it was offensive to women.

"It's not funny. Let's get Barack on," a man shouted from the crowd, which paid US$2,300 each to support the Illinois senator.

There are new sheriffs in Town and they have one rule: Nobody makes Barack Obama look bad. No one is exempt - not John Lewis, not Jesse Jackson, not Pastor Wright, not Tavis Smiley, not America's first "Black" President, Bill Clinton, and not Bernie Mac. Right now I can just feel the Acolytes giving Bernie "THE LOOK." right before the acolytes drag him to the woodshed.

Entertainment Industrial Complex, you have never faced a foe more powerful and determined that Obama Acolytes. They do not play. They are mercenary and ruthless an no one is immune from their wrath. That is why I feel bad for Bernie Mac ( not really ) He violated the Prime Directive for Obama Acolyte-is. Thou Shall Not EMBARRASS THE HEY-EL OUT OF BARACK OBAMA. There are no excuses. There are no ACCIDENTS! Your intentions are irrelevant.

I am going to have to reassess the Acolytes. I had been disturbed at times by their methods and myopic zeal, but the prospect of Acolytes grabbing members of the Entertainment Industrial Complex by the scruffs of their necks and telling them to have a seat OR ELSE warms my heart. A movement of acolytes shutting down foolishness from coast to coast.

Is it possible that if Barack Obama makes it all the way to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue that the Black Community will become less tolerant of the Ministers of Minstrelsy and the Hip Hop Industrial Complex? Will we be shutting the foolishness DOWN. Will the charge be lead by the acolytes?

Watch your back Bernie, you done messed up now. That noise you are hearing? That is the sound of the woodshed door. They are coming for you.