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Monday, December 31, 2007

HOLIDAY FOOLISHNESS: A Retrospective -

I'm BAAAAAACK! Did you miss me? Don't answer that question. We had a lovely relatively drama free vacation. I kept my promise and only chimed in to give my instant review of The Great Debaters and now it is back to the grind stone.


Just because we went on Christmas vacation didn't mean that FOOLISHNESS took a rest. Oh yes, folks were acting up even during the season of glad tidings and joy. We just elected to ignore them Therefore I present to you... HOLIDAY FOOLISHNESS: A Retrospective.

R. Kelly Redux- The World's Most idiotic grandmother

Somebody finally went to jail in the R. Kelly case. Too bad it wasn't R. Kelly.

A 49-year-old grandmother(the idiot's name is Jean Johnson) has pleaded guilty to contempt of court after admitting she snapped photos of R&B superstar R. Kelly in a Chicago courtroom last week. Describing herself as Kelly's "biggest fan," she said she couldn't resist snapping four grainy pictures of him as he sat across from her last Thursday. SOURCE
Sorry Jean, you're far too old for him. Maybe she was taking the photos for her teenage granddaughters... you know the ones R. Kelly appears to have a predilection for. The judge sentenced her to FIVE days in jail (she got credit for time served on an unrelated matter BOO!) to rub it in, the judge ordered her cellphone DESTROYED. Now if we could only get R. Kelly to take pictures of HIMSELF in the courtroom.

Al Sharpton's Many Wives

I need some of you to sit down and let me have a talk with y'all about my favorite pompadoured preacha'. I am concerned that some of you have developed an unhealthy fixation with the Rev. Al Sharpton. It was like WAOD readers have attached GPS tracking devices and every single time Rev. Al made a move, I got an email about it. Just say NO! Y'all are not his wife and you ought to thank God for that. I really can't blame y'all because Rev. Sharpton, absolutely exhausted from all his freedom fighting and whatnot, was running the streets doing godknowswhat.

Y'all remember how Reverend Sharpton was supposed to picketing outside of Madison Square Garden to protest New York Knicks coach, Isiah Thomas calling Black women bitches and then saying that it was okay for Black men to call Black women bitches, but if a White man did it, he would be offended. Y'all remember how Reverend Al said that if Thomas didn't appologize he was going to be outside Madison Square garden in the freezing cold protesting with his megaphone and whatnot?

Well A faithful WAOD reader R. Banks sent me this tidbit over the holidays:

Hey,
Did you see Al Sharpton protesting the Knicks yesterday? Neither did I.
He was at the game courtside. Cheering the Knicks and Isiah Thomas.
What happened to the protest's? Not only is he not protesting, he is
supporting them and doesn't think Isiah Thomas should be fired. They
were found guilty and even had to pay 11 million dollars, but thats
still not good enough for our favorite Reverend. I guess he wanted to
cheer on Isiah, the Knicks, and Kobe Bryant.
Wll R., perhaps Reverend Al was given some bad directions and he mistook being outside Madison Square Garden in the freezing cold, he was warm and toasty sitting COURTSIDE. Oh and maybe the Rev. All got confused, instead of fighting on behalf of the downtrodden, he has taken to trying to protect the job or a multimillionaire sexual harasser:

Sharpton: “Let me ask you this: The Secretary General of the U.N. was sitting near me. Do we fire him because we don’t have world peace? I mean, come on.”

The Rev. Al Sharpton: Isiah stays. NY TIMES

Thanks for clearing that up Rev. Al.The Al Sharpton holiday tour continued with a National Action Network press release disguised as a work of serious journalism in the Washington Post

"He seems to have evolved into a new respectability, at least in the city," said Norman Siegel, a lawyer and former director of the New York Civil Liberties Union, who has known Sharpton for 20 years. WAPO
I know all the Black bloggers who blogged the Jena 6 story with their blood, sweat and tears will LOVE this quote:

Sharpton put together a march in Jena, La., in support of six black teenagers jailed in the beating of a white student, and he held a protest rally outside the Justice Department in Washington to demand more prosecution of hate crimes. WAPO
This reporter didn't even TRY! Seriously Washington Post, get your facts straight and go to Louisiana and speak with LOCAL leaders about Sharpton's march. Or better yet, read the Chicago Tribune you dolts.

And now, he is being wooed by the leading Democratic presidential candidates, all of whom seek his endorsement. "I think this has been a banner year, to say the least," said Sharpton, smiling contentedly over coffee. WAPO
Now call me crazy, BUT, who knew that injustice, police brutality and the trampling of constitutional rights was something to celebrate? This is further evidence that the Civil Rights Industrial Complex has commoditized social justice. I'm sorry, but does he sound like he's selling a product? What is “BANNER” about the death of a little girl's father? What's “BANNER” about the Jena 6? What is “BANNER” about Megan Williams? He should have said that he has a heavy heart that in the year 2007, the country continues to wrestle with the issue of racial injustice. Oh well, at least he was honest.

And he truly has been busy: He's planning marches in Cleveland and Long Island, but before he marches, the good Reverned had to get his party on... in Vegas

Yes, he wrapped up his season of running the streets in Las Vegas. Y'all know how he is America's new Decency Czar and he is going to wage was against the misogyny in music blah blah blah. Well maybe he was doing reconnaissance again because yet again, he was all hugged up with members of the Hip Hop Industrial Complex. Check out Rev. Al on the red carpet of the opening of Jay-Z's 40/40 club. Now now. Pipe down. I know many a preacha' that likes to be up in da' club. You can save a lot of souls in da' club. Why look, here is Rev. Al Sharpton, Decency Czar throwing up a sign indicating that he is either a member of DST, Rock-a-fella Records, or some unknown street gang of a group of men who are entirely TOO old to be up in da' club..I can see he is hard at work battling the Hip Hop Industiral Complex.

Before y'all start whining about mean old Gina picking on lil' ole pitiful and defenseless Rev. Al, I am not the only one that noted the blatant hypocrisy. the folks over at Stereohyped noticed that it appears that we have a fox guarding the hen house. And the Washington Post wants us to believe that he is respectable. Whatever.

Let me just throw it out there. One of y'all reading this blog had BETTER run for President in 2012. I am serious. You don't have to win or get any votes or anything crazy like that. You just have to put your name on the ballot and make a couple of quick witted retorts during a couple of debates and then all of a sudden, you are to taken seriously. Seriously, who volunteers?

A Salute to a Brother Defending Black Women

I first learned about this tragic story on Sandra Rose. Darius Miller is sitting in a coma in an Atlanta area hospital after he was brutally attacked outside an Atlanta hotspot. Why was he brutalized? Because he was trying to protect a group of Black women on the streets being harassed by a bunch of gremlins trying to force these women to play a role in some “Girls Gone Wild” esq video they were shooting and they pounces on his like a PACK OF JACKALS! I mean HOW DARE a Black woman walk the streets without having to perform for whatever group of perverts decide that they want her to be their next Video ho'? So y'all pray for this Brother. If you want to send him your thoughts and well wishes, he is in critical condition at Crawford Long hospital in Atlanta. There is a WAR ON BLACK WOMEN. Right now it is a war of attrition that no one is paying attention. If it is this bad now, imagine in 20 years. None of your daughters will have freedom of movement. They'll be dodging violent video camera toting hordes.

Other Holiday Hijinks and Happenings

I'll be back later tonight with my last post of 2007. Now I am off to Starbucks to finish up the long awaited book. Can you feel the excitement? Either that or I am still recovering from swilling down two caffeine infused syrupy concoctions of Starbucks overpriced elixir. That being said. Starbucks has cured me of my writer's block and I am never more productive than when I am attempting to drown out the sound of the whirling coffechinofrapamocha machine while listen to the Starbucks music network. Whatever I have by 11:59 tonight is what I am going with. At some point you have to know when to say ENOUGH!