As part of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, WAOD invited African American men to weigh in on the issue. This is the third in our series: WAOD Lets A Brother Speak on DV. If you haven't read the first two posts from DJ Black Adam and Gun Fighter, go back and read them. This contribution is from Geno Jones. I met him when we went at it on his show, Two Guys and a Mic. I went 6 for 7. You can reach Geno at his website. Take it away Geno.....
This month is domestic violence awareness month but for me, the truth is EVERY MONTH should be domestic violence awarness month(In many cases it should be every day!)among several titles that I have, one is an author of an audio book called "Game Recognize Game". One of the issues I talk about in a very personal and passionate way is DV...So here are a few words that I hope and pray can educate, empower, inspire and motive the women that read the following...
First, in any area of life from personal to professional thre are NEGOTIABLES and NON-NEGOTIABLES.....ANY TIME(even if it's the 1st time)ANY TIME A MAN HITS YOU, THAT IS A NON-NEGOTIABLE...I know we live a world where we believe in second chances BUT, somethings you just DON'T get a second chance for. DV is one of them...
Second...Ladies, 2 people in a relationship will be 1 of 2 things to the other person. an ASSET or a LIABILITY...Ladies, look hard in the mirror, take the emotion out of this question, don't think about how fine he is, how great a body he's has, how great the SEX is, how much MONEY he's has, or that YOU can FIX him and ask yourself this question?.....Is this man an ASSET or a LIABILITY to me(do not equate the word asset with money)an ASSET meaning, does he enhance a part of you that makes you a better person mentally, spiritually, emotionally or morally. If he doesn't, then honestly ask yourself WHY AM I IN THIS RELATIONSHIP? One answer I know for sure is that in NO WAY is DV an ASSET to ANY relationship.
Third, ladies NEVER let ANYONE define YOU to YOU!...So if you are being beaten physically, if you're being beaten emotionally and mentally and being told, You can't go anywhere because NOBODY ELSE WILL WANT YOU BECAUSE YOU GOT TOO MANY KIDS, OR YOUR NOT PRETTY ENOUGH, OR TOO BIG(or too small), OR YOU'RE NOT SMART ENOUGH, OR WHATEVER...please know this...the ONLY WAY ANOTHER PERSON CAN DEFINE WHO YOU REALLY ARE, IS IF YOU LET THEM...because no one but your GOD truly knows what motivates and inspires you...what gifts and passions you have inside of you. and trust me, YOU DO HAVE SOME GIFT, GOD GIVES US ALL SOME GIFT!...You have to identify it, develop it, nuture it and NOT let someone else punk(or discourage)YOU out of pursuing your passion and sharing your gift with the world so You can be a Blessing to YOU AND YOUR FAMILY! I'm going close by sharing this with you.
When I was 4 years old I saw my pregnant mother being beaten by the (I use the term loosely)man she was pregnant by. I tried to tackle this man and push him down TWO flights of stairs. To this day, I can still see that beating as if it's happening RIGHT NOW.However, the one thing that my mother(& my Grandmother)made sure of is that I WOULD NOT CONTINUE THAT CYCLE OF VIOLENCE...Mothers...You can't teach your son how to be a MAN...BUT, You can teach Him HOW TO TREAT A WOMAN AND HOW NOT TO MISTREAT A WOMAN!
If something I've said here can touch, help, give hope or save AT LEAST ONE WOMAN'S LIFE(hopefully many more)than I thank God for using me a vessel for that change...Thank You for Your time.
Geno Jones
GenoJones.com
GenoJones@aol.com
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Thanks Geno! Speak on it folks! *goes to sit on the WAOD stoop and watch the comments walk by*
